Bittersweet Longing~

“In your life, you meet people. Some you never think about again. Some, you wonder what happened to them. There are some that you wonder if they ever think about you. And then there are some you wish you never had to think about again. But you do.” (Author: Unknown)
It's been a busy week here in the Tullous' house hold with Jason working a cycling camp and Liam and I on our own. Thankfully, my mom has been able to spend time with Liam while I run off to teach. All in all, things are going well. Sleeping has been spotty and we wake a bit rough and groggy, but we mange to get on with the day.
I have been in more of a contemplative place as of late. And it seems that I have been thinking a lot about the people who have come and gone in my life and, well, I get a little sad. I suppose the sadness is due to the simple fact that I miss those dear to me that I seem to have lost touch with. I know that this is part of life, that people will come and go, but it doesn't mean that i like it or, on some level, wish things were different.
In my life, I have moved a lot and nearly every 3 years. Yes, distance creates a gap in time and space. Life happens and people get busy so there is no blame just an ache in my heart. It's simply me missing face-to-face moments and everyday conversations with those who have made a difference in my life at some point along the way. And really the every day events of life are sacred.
In some ways loosing touch feels like a loss, as if this is a phase of change where it is time to let go. Life, it seems, is moving us on our chosen way. Of course, I know well that there is good to follow. For as we let go of one thing , we make room for some other wonderful thing to come in. Maybe this is simply a case of making room for the new. Maybe it is time to open my heart and life up to new friends, companions and teachers. Come to think of it, as I look over my life, every move seems to bring new people into my life and big shifts happen.
It is 2 1/2 years into my time here in Tucson and 3 years seems to mark the magical moment of feeling settled and integrated into my new community or, at least, that has been the pattern for many years now. With all the moving I have done in my life, you would think I would be good at this, that I would be a pro at this, but I am not. Moving and leaving those I love and hold dear behind has always been the hardest part for me. When I reflect on the places I have lived, it is the people I miss most.
I trust my travels in life thus far are for a reason I do not yet understand. Apparently, I signed up for this. So I'd better be grateful for all the comings and goings and count my blessings for having met some really beautiful people along the way who have helped me grow into the better part of me. Counting... one, two, three...
May I always cherish the sweet moments and take to heart the lessons learned from great teachers along the way who were so ordinary and perfectly extraordinary in their very own way.
Nostalgic,
Marcia
Another great quote: (Couldn't decide so chose to include both)

“Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for awhile and leave footprints on our hearts. And we are never, ever the same.”

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A Mother's Plea For Help ~

Image
“It’s not the load that breaks you down; it’s the way you carry it.” -Lena Horne We often think that admitting struggle is a sign of weakness, but we all struggle sometimes. We all get overwhelmed sometimes. We all need help sometimes. Acknowledging this is not a sign of weakness, but struggling alone is a choice to grow weak. Dear Friends, This will be a very different entry than what I usually write.  This entry is really a request for help, ideas, suggestions, empathy, a show of love by offering anything useful to help me help my son with his separation anxiety.  Let me share with you my situation... My son is 5 and has been going to preschool 4 days a week for 3 1/2 hours.  The school he goes to is really a wonderful place.  It is whimsical and small and community oriented. His teacher is the best.  She is kind, compassionate, loving, and she loves what she does.  I love her.  He only has 9 kids in his class and there are at least 2 or 3 ad...
Read more

Big and Wide Open~

Image
Photo Credit: Mathew Dols I'm listening to Ben Howard and feeling quite nostalgic.  My head is still a bit clogged and foggy from being sick, which may have something to do with the state I am in. But truthfully, it feels more like old stuff that's coming up and moving out.   Either way, I feel inspired to write and let this inner desire for understanding and expression take place. I really can't help but marvel at the way time passes,  along with people and places and moments that seem to live forever.  There are certain moments and times in life that shape so much of who we are, what we become along the way, and the way in which we find our way into our self. For me, there have been many wonderful people, places and moments that have shaped me into the person I am now.  I am not just speaking of the big and obvious things like marriage and having children.  You see,  I grew up an army brat and moved around a lot. I moved from state to state,...
Read more

A Long Time Away~

Image
Photo by: Matthew Dols  My last post was in January. It's been 4 months since I've last written a thing. I guess I've been away so long because I haven't really known what to say or think or share. On some level, I've been reluctant to share what's really going on for me for fear of how such information might be perceived. Maybe it's all part of this strange change that I seem to be in. I find myself questioning everything from teaching to parenting and everything else in between. I honestly don't know why I feel so displaced and uncertain, but I do. And I find myself less and less interested in the things I used to be interested in, and more and more uninspired by those things that use to really inspire me. I find myself getting bored, to some degree, with the whole yoga scene. It's all become so trendy and bendy and ultra ego driven. It's a bit too much-look at me- for me. Don't get the wrong idea here,  I'm not writing this post...
Read more