The Good Stuff...
April 10, 2009~
A couple of months back I decided to create a facebook profile because a dear friend continued to insist I do so. I resisted for a while because I was doing just fine with email. Clearly, I didn't know what I was missing. Anyway, since my profile was established it has turned into something quite wonderful. I am so glad I did join the facebook community because I love it.
I have been in contact with so many people I didn't think I'd see, let alone hear from again. I've rekindled my friendship with a dear friend I've known since I was 13 and living in Stuttgart Germany, reconnected with a friend from my high school days who has blossomed into the artist he was always meant to be, and am getting to know new friends better across the Internet lines. I am quite thrilled by all this and, in some weird way, I feel like I hang out with a friend everyday in this way. In fact, I am one of those folks who visits daily and, often, more than once. I guess you could say I am hooked and love the link to the world and the ability to keep in touch with those whom I appreciate and adore.
Of course, when I cross paths with someone from the past, it brings back memories. I reestablish my connection and am pulled back in time and the best part is that it's not as sad a thing as I thought it might be.
For example, an old friend posted some black and white photographs that contained images of myself and others from 15 years ago. I find it hard to believe that 15 years have passed and can see how much time changes things. I can see how much I've changed. Of course, it is obvious that over time things will change because that is the natural way of things.
The point is that when I reflect back over certain phases in my life, I feel that my perception of that time has changed too. Even those dense, hard, sorrow-filled moments in my life aren't so heavy and dark anymore. I am kind of amazed at the fact that most of my memories are more full of the good stuff and good times than of the bad. I am not sure when or how that happened or even if that is something that happens. Maybe I choose to remember the good stuff rather than the bad.
What do my memories and choices say of my evolution? I suppose both say a lot and that I have come a long way. I love that I can look back without crying or feeling sad. Instead, it's more like my look back is one of curiosity or wonder. It is almost as if I question whether that time in my life actually happened. Yes, the good and the bad are all rolled into one and the view and feel is more even. It's like I finally get the importance of each experience and that there is no evolution without experience.
I am thankful for it all. I am thankful for the moments when I am and have been inspired. I am thankful for all the people who I have met along the way. I am thankful for the times when my heart hurt and I was an absolute mess. I am thankful for those times when I fell to pieces because that gave me the opportunity to create a new version of me. I got to look at the pile of me on the floor and decide how to put it all back together. That is the real gift. Those messy, painful moments were more valuable than I could know. Who knew I would recall those times with such reverence, sweetness and appreciation. Who knew that all the tears would lead to a river of joy that rushes within me. I certainly did not. But now I do.
Here's to the good stuff hidden in the muck!
Love and Light,