"Done is better than good."
(Liz Gilbert and her mom)
"Don't let great be the enemy of good."
Just start and get it done! I have been working on this blog post for nearly a week and have yet to finish it! So here I am, sitting in the living room, tapping away on the keys while Lila sleeps. So, where shall I begin? Oh, that's right, anywhere will do. Just begin and get it done and out there today!
So how are things? How is life up North? And what's going on in general? Well, let's see, Summer ended the day after the Fall Equinox. Not long after that, came the cooler temperatures and colored leaves, and the socks and shoes and the long sleeves. Fall here has been beautiful, and I have loved being able to feel and see the beauty of this season in all it's radiant glory.
It's funny the details you are able to notice when you haven't seen or experienced something in a long time. One of the things that I have noticed about the Autumn season is just how fast it comes and goes. One day, you see a slight change of color in the leaves and then before you know it, all the leaves on the trees are gold or red or orange and then the leaves let go of the branch and fall effortlessly to the ground. The trees are full of vibrant color and then they are bare. There is no hesitation in the change or the fall. And that has been such a sweet thing to witness. Nature is a great teacher.
As this season has progressed, I've discovered that I love the smell of the smoke from the wood burning stoves mingling with fresh, mountain air, and the sound the leaves make when they're blown down the street or when you crunch them under your feet. And the cool, crisp air that this autumn season brings feels refreshing and invigorating. So, in short, Fall has been amazing. And my body and soul feel more in tune with this time of change. In other words, it feels more natural to me to want to stay in and cook or cuddle up on a cold, gray day than it does on a hot, sunny one. So this aspect of things that I am experiencing up here in Flag are really, really good. And I am thankful for that.
As for the rest of life here, things have been up and down. Things have felt hard at home with Liam and his intense moments of ups and downs, which may be due in part to him not eating enough every couple of hours or just getting too tired and overstimulated at school. Either way, we are working hard to find a way to help him change some of his negative behavior and to help him even out his emotions for the betterment of us all. Finding the right way to do that has been immensely challenging. Lila is doing well for the most part except for this whole waking up in the middle of the night from 12-2 thing several times a week, which I have not been loving at all. And all I can say is that lack of sleep sucks and is tough! It's hard to feel motivated or clear headed when running on very little sleep. So I am hoping that there are less wake ups as she gets over this 5ths disease virus and starts to feel better.
Then, there is this running your own business thing that Jason is doing, which obviously brings its own challenges and rewards. That said, Jason is doing a great job and continually reaches out to make connections to help his ideas fly and to spread the word of his vision for his business (gotenac.com) I think he's pretty amazing at what he does and the ideas he comes up with. But it's all the waiting for people to respond or for things to gel that is the hard part. Of course, this is a patience thing. You work and do and wait. Life is a lot like tending to a garden I suppose. You dig and ready the soil, plant the seeds, water, weed and wait, and then, something sprouts up and out. It all takes time...
Add to all this already crazy up and down, my own starting over teaching and all the stuff I feel coming up in me at this time and, well, it's been a rather interesting journey. To be very honest, it's not been easy. I've been in such a hard place these last few months since our move. And yes, a big move brings a lot up for anyone and everyone, but add to this an internal expansion or something or other and it's downright overwhelming. It's a double whammy transition, the kind that makes your head spin and makes you feel like you've lost your direction. Anyway, it's been hard, and I'm ready to be past this part. And when I catch myself thinking like this, I have to remind myself that it has only been about 5 months since we moved! That's not a long time! And so here is my chance to remember to go easy on myself, to give things time to change and to let go of my expectations of how I think I should be handling everything. Here is my chance to remember that I am doing just fine and that I am not failing. I am learning. And here's my chance to think again of the quotes above:
"Done is better than good." And "Don't let great be the enemy of good."
Right now, it's about just showing up to my life to do what needs to get done. Right now, it's just about showing up to practice, to write, to teach, to share, to connect in whatever way I can manage it. Not everything I do has to be great or even good so long as I am showing up and doing something. And maybe this is the real lesson in all this: Just show up. Or as the Nike motto goes: "Just do it!"
Just do the best you can right now and know it will get better.