I'm making rice. The wind is wild and blowing outside. It's a stay-close-to-home sort of day as I am feeling quite fatigued and emotional. This tired I am feeling is not usual for me. These, of course, are all signs that I am nearing the end of this sweet pregnancy. Now, I am in a place of contemplation, trying to get clear if I need to begin my break from teaching a week early. On the one hand, my mind says, "you can make it through the next few days." While on the other hand, my body is saying, "it's break time my love." So I will sit with this question and see how I feel in the morning. Today is a day to just be.
Since I am home, I have been doing a fair amount of thinking. I have been thinking a lot about my friend Heather. Everyday I visit her blog to read the words she has written and open myself to the teachings she and her beautiful son, Max, have to share and offer. Every time I visit this blog, I cry. I cry for Heather's loss. I cry for the love she and every mother has for their child. I cry for the beauty and heartfelt sharing that each person offers up and how each person pours their hearts out in the comment box. I cry knowing that each day my dear friend wakes, she decides to do something good in whatever way she can. I do not know, but imagine she wakes with a deep ache, a deep longing in her heart to have her son near and to get out of bed to pump Max's Milk and send it out into the world to babies in need of mother's milk is a heroic feat in and of itself.
Everyday Heather wakes, she decides to respond to what life has handed her instead of react and retract from the pain. I am moved by her ability to love, to be courageous, to be so vulnerable and yet so alive and present with it all. Heather is a shining example of a spiritual being, an honest to goodness human being, a spiritual warrior with a heart that has been split wide open.
So, please, if you have not visited the site listed below, take some time to do so now. Visit the High Five Max web page and read what Heather has written and what other people have offered up as love in the form of words in a show of support for a mother and son who are most deserving of it.
I hope you will be moved to Love more deeply, more fully because you want to not because you have to. I hope you remember to look around and be grateful for all the good in your life and really appreciate all the people in your life because they won't be here forever. I hope you decide to do your best, to live your best and keep opening your heart again and again knowing there are no guarantees you will not get hurt. Instead, I hope you will realize that Letting Love In, letting Life in is worth the risk every time. The question is, what will you decide to do with what life brings you? How will you make good on your promise to live this life well? Remember, we get to choose. So... Do you choose LOVE or do you choose Fear?