Back At It~

I am finally through the hard part of the last few weeks.  Really the hardest part was all the waiting I feel like I've been doing during these past few weeks.  Once I got the word that my body was taking care of the last of the pregnancy on it's own, meaning no more physical symptoms and more dissolution and re-absorption of what was left,  I felt ready to get on with life.  I have jumped right back into things.

In fact this past weekend is a perfect example of moving forward.  This past weekend Jason, Liam and I went up to Mt. Lemmon and walked in the stream for two hours.  We caught lots of tadpoles, a baby frog, a butterfly, some grasshoppers, and went on the hunt for a praying mantis, which we never found. I love how Liam helps me remember the art of exploration and wonder.  It was so great to be among the trees and walking in the water exploring nature for the sweetest of treasures.

Sunday I got back to teaching my 8:30 class and it was great.  I had 28 wonderful people join me for a sacred morning practice.  All the students were so happy I was back and many shared with me that they had missed me.  How sweet is that?!  I feel fortunate, and I feel loved.

After class, I got home and started cleaning the house.  Jason and Liam had started the process and boy did we get a lot of work done.  It was great to get the house clean and organized and clear out the stagnant energy in the house that had been lingering for the last two weeks.  It is amazing what a clean house can do to uplift my spirits and, in some ways, set things right.

I had this awesome realization during this past week about how mine and Jason's love has changed and grown over the years.  I am lucky to have such a good guy, a good husband that truly cares about and loves me as I am.  Jason and I have not had it easy over these past, nearly, 4 years.  We have experienced a lot ups and downs together.  The thing is that the difficult moments either bring you together or tear you apart.  I think that when two people are really committed to each other and the life they have together, there is no problem that you cannot solve together.

 I was washing the dishes and thinking how wonderful it is that I love Jason more now and in a deeper way than I ever have before.  In some ways, I feel that these last two miscarriages have really helped to open my eyes and heart to what is right in front of me.  It's easy to overlook the obvious if you are looking to far out. Sometimes all we need is a shift in perspective and to make an effort to appreciate what we already have.

So despite the disappointment I still feel,  life is good.  In many ways, I am quite surprised at how quickly I have bounced back this time around.  My adaptability and resilience to life's surprises and abrupt changes shows me how much I have grown.  I am grateful for my strength and faith and for the love I have all around me.  I am fortunate in so many ways, and all I need to do is remember that.

Strong and Flexible Like Bamboo,



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