This year marks the year of tens. On March 16th I turned 40, thus ending one decade and beginning a new one. In May, May 2nd to be exact, I celebrate my 10th year teaching yoga. And, this year also marks 10 years ago that Jason and I moved away from Flagstaff.
Which brings me to my point, which is that this seems to be a full-circle moment or time in my life. It very much feels like I am at a starting point, that the turn of the wheel is complete and now begins a whole new phase of living and learning.
At the beginning of March, my husband resigned his position with CTS, the company he's been a part of and working for over the past 11 years. He was just ready to move on and out into the world more. And so we agreed that it was worth the leap. In the midst of that change, we decided to make another change, as we figured there is no reason to hold back or wait for what we know we want.
So here's a little back story...
Last summer we went to Flagstaff for a few days for fun and to just to get a break from the heat. While there, we both realized how much we missed Flagstaff, the trees and the peace of living in a smaller town. So after much consideration, we have decided to move back to Flag.
We both agree that we would like to raise our kids in a smaller town and be closer to trails. We miss the seasons and cooler temperatures and the welcome, relaxed feel of Flagstaff. And frankly, I think we need this move just as much as we want it. So it's a good choice all the way around.
Actually, since Jason and I decided we were gonna move to Flagstaff, I have had this one word that keeps coming up for me. That word is: roots. So I guess I really think about this move back to the mountains as getting back to basics, setting down roots and beginning again. And to tell the truth, I have never felt more at home than in Flagstaff. And all my life I have been in search of home.
Growing up any army brat and moving every 3 years doesn't exactly help one to know what home is. And for a long time, I think home was an idea more than a feeling for me. Now, instead of searching for this ideal place, I am simply after the feeling of being home. And for me, as is with most things, I know it when I feel it. It's an inner knowing or resonance that let's me know when things are right or not. And now, I just trust that feeling and myself to make the right choice or choices. And I know Flagstaff is it because of the way I feel when I am up there. Every time I have gone back to visit, I get the same feeling of relief. It's like I can take a deep breath in and enjoy it. That's the best way I can explain it.
So even though I know this is the right thing to do for me and my family, it hasn't been an easy decision to make. It hasn't been easy because my parents live here in Tucson and we are all very close. We see my parents weekly and they help us a lot. So not seeing them as often will take some getting used to. The good news is we can just take a short drive down the hill back to T-town for a visit, or they can drive up the hill to see us. : )
The other part of this choice that is bittersweet is the fact that I will not be teaching regularly at YogaOasis anymore. It brings a little sadness to my heart as I love YogaOasis so much and my regular students are family to me. YO really is my other home. Even though I will not be teaching my regular classes each week, I will continue to come down to teach workshops every other month or so, and I will very much look forward to that.
I guess the leaving is never easy, even when you're ready to go. We have been here for nearly 7 years and, after a while, a place grows on you and becomes part of your life story. It's amazing to think that Liam was just 11 months old when we moved here and hadn't yet started walking. And at that time, we were a family of 3 and now we are 4. We've all done a lot of learning and growing here in Tucson. I am grateful for all the opportunities of growth I've had here even when it was hard. I am grateful for it all.
At this point, I really just want to make the most of my time here and focus on the positives of our choice versus the perceived negatives or the sad parts. I want to arrive in the woods ready to embrace the new. I didn't do that when we first moved here to Tucson, and I suffered because of it. And I'm sure my discontent and difficulty in letting go of Colorado Springs wasn't easy on Jason either. So I will choose differently this time so that we are happy going into this together. I will choose differently because it matters for all of us and not just me.
In closing, I hope to see some of you lovely Tucson peeps in class, over tea or coffee, dinner or play time before we leave. My last regular classes will be June 3, 5, and 8. Also, I am teaching another series of 4 Restorative classes. The dates for that are as follows: May 10, 18, 31, and June 7 . Please sign up and join me! And if you are in need of some trees, cool air and a beautiful hike, come up and see us. We would love your company.
Restorative Yoga Series details:
Me and Mr. Mingus in Oak Creek Canyon
West Fork trail~